This was after Dillon’s rental car got keyed in a Yamba parking lot while he was surfing. The keyer’s total lack of ingenuity is what was most disappointing. He could have taken his vandalism in so many directions.

Like, he could have been clever and scratched “MY BACK,” or been artsy and written a sonnet, or been subtle and drawn directions back to the highway. He could have been direct and written, “Dillon, in the future, surf another place rather than here.” He could have been helpful and keyed in the number for an auto body shop.

Instead he just did the predictable wavy lines you get by holding out a key and walking past. Maybe the lines were meant to be avant-garde or something, but…no, no they weren’t. It was just lazy.

Either way the car was a rental and Dillon had insurance so he just added a BUMMER tag and drove off. I guess the lesson for local miscreants is that if you must key, take pride and key creative shit.